SERIOUSLY???!!!

Oh my GOSH!!!! Seriously....I haven't been on here since October 24? I mean, I KNEW it had been far too long, but I've missed THAT much!?! No wonder I've been feeling an enormous sense of withdrawal!

I know everyone is so busy at this time of year, but mine has been C-R-A-Z-Y! In addition to preparing for BOTH of my kids' birthdays, I've also been busy with Halloween sleepover, regular sleepovers, regular everyday life of a single parent, an enormous amount of things to do at work to where I can't even get on to read some posts, we remodeled the office at work (paint, carpet...involving moving everything out & back in again), getting Christmas gifts, and {smiles} now we've added to our family. We haven't had pets for about 5 years & I've never owned a dog in my life. So there's been a lot of adjusting & learning going on. Below, let me introduce you to Batman (the cat) & Flash (the dog). Needless to say, it's been an INTERESTING 6 weeks or so in my life. FAAAAAR too busy for my taste, but this w/e I'm finally able to slow it down a notch or two & breathe.

So, I wanted to let you all know that I've missed you terribly....(and yes, hope you've missed me as well!)....and I pray for those of you I know have special things going on in your lives for which you could use prayer warriors. I may not have been able to read your posts, but you've been in my heart!

I hope everyone's Thanksgiving was blessed & that this most holy season is sacred and precious for each of you!

Hugs & love ~ Merana

Old Writing #3

The Significance of My Prayers

The human mind cannot even begin to comprehend all that is God.

As I pray, I thank the Lord for His love, His peace, His strength, and His time to listen to lil 'ol me.

Then is dawns on me: "Boy, I'm acting like I'm the only one who exists. I'm communicating with God as if I'm the only one on the phone with Him." I then begin to understand that I am NOT the only one. While He hears me and I sit quietly to hear Him speak with me, I realize He's also communicating with other believers.

He's performing miracles of healing, protection, conception, and birth. He's comforting those who are hurting, both physically and emotionally. He's guiding His children who are lost in the dark. He is welcoming our loved ones home. He is leading people to food and shelter. He's providing a friend in time of need. He is forgiving us our sins. He is opening His heart to those who give their hearts freely to Him.

He is in every conversation. He is creating the day before me, the songs the birds sing, the glorious sunrise, the arching rainbow, the tranquil river's flow, the gentle rain, the warm breeze, or the invigorating cold. He is sending the butterfly to spread its colorful wings as it lands on a fragrant flower.

He is doing all these things and more, while I sit here praying what must seem to Him such a simple prayer. But the thing is, I also realize that I have His undivided attention. Even my most mundane chores matter to Him. He knows the number of hairs on my head (Luke 12:7) and He knew all there was to me before I was even in my mother's womb (Jerremiah 1:5a and Psalm 139:13).

If He can do all these things, as He unconditionally opens His heart to me, how can I possibly not believe that even my most simple prayers aren't already being answered?

Praise to You, Lord God!

(photo credit: Santita88)

This picture just personifies how I feel right now. After weeks of uncertainty, fear, and an unbelievable amount of reflection & soul-searching, I finally feel free! And I praise you Lord, God, with tears streaming down my face that I am not facing cancer or surgery. Now perhaps I can sleep through the night without waking in a fit, and not being able to get back to sleep.

And I'm sorry, Lord. You know that trust is hands-down the biggest problem I have. I heard you clearly saying this afternoon, after I got the call from my first doctor, "When are you really going to trust me?" To which I replied, "I do trust you, Lord, but...". To which you immediately cut me off & said, "Yeah, it's that 'but' part you still need to work on!"

I hear you, Lord. And I'm truly sorry. I don't know how to thank you for the promise I started to wonder about - "plans for hope and a future". You do have them for me. I guess I just should have not given in to the despair & doubt & worry, and instead maintained in the forefront (not in the background) that I refused to believe the God I serve who has finally gotten me to the place He's been leading me for 11 years, would allow me to face that kind of struggle without even having the chance to enjoy this place for a little while. But you showed me, just like you always do...again. I'm trying, Father, I am...to trust you implicitly. Forgive me.

But mostly....thank you, Jesus, for helping me to really evaluate my life & those things that matter most. I look forward to what I can do for you. Light my path, and show me the way. I want to live in a way that is pleasing to you, and not about me.

And my dear, dear BB's .... thank you ALL for your kind words and prayers and faith. Your love and encouragement has strengthened me to face whatever I would face. I praise God for all of you as well!

~ Merana

Singing Praises

This picture hangs in my bathroom & I always notice it. THIS time, I decided to list them, which you'll find below...
(and in no particular order, I might note! and to which, I'm sure to add to)

1. Lord, I praise you & thank you, that I can have a relationship with you. I'm not worthy. I never will be. But you love me anyway... that's pretty awesome! And that I live where I can freely worship you and speak of your glory without worry of harm or persecution!


2. discovering blogging & the friends I've made here! (ok...and the HOURS I spend lost in blogland...when I can!)

3. The mountains...the smell of mossy, earthy beauty! And the way the clouds cast shadows on them. And OH TO LIVE THE REST OF MY DAYS HERE ONE DAY!....



4. The sound of rain (& yes, even thunder...and especially now that my boys are no longer afraid of it!)

5. friendships I've maintained over years and tho' many miles separate us! (Find Out Who Your Friends Are by Tracy Lawrence says it all!)

6. Recognizing that friendships can form with different generations (dear friends Katharine who is 90, and Betty who is 74!)

7. listening to the laughter of my children playing with their friends!

8. seeing pictures other people find of God's creation - http://didyoubringyourcamera.blogspot.com/

http://joanswritingjourney.blogspot.com/

or even me...
9. cooking...just for the pleasure of it...when nobody's starving & listening to smooth jazz cd's while doing it. (My favorite being potato chowder or baked spaghetti) And Father, thank you that I have food readily available, the resources, and the ability to do it all when so many do not!

10. my ever-favorite mocha-colored hazelnut bliss!

11. CHOCOLATE!!!!

12. my front porch sanctuary
13. candlelight & the soft glow it creates in our home

14. the sound of crickets & birds singing in the morning

15. having the Spirit reveal someting new in Scripture I've never seen before!

16. good music that makes you just close your eyes, nod your head, and "move to the music" as it takes you back!

17. God's Eye (as my son calls it)..

18. laying under a tree to watch the sunlight dance thru the leaves


19. The opportunity to see this past summer just how blue is our ocean from being out in it!

20. Sunrises and sunsets

21. this lovely place - the Wyndham Resort in Freeport, Bahamas - that we visited this summer



22. the chance to be whimsical with a freshly opened jar of peanut butter


23. But mostly, Lord, thank you for these little cherubs & the life you've blessed us to now have! (Well...ok...cherubs may be pushin' it sometimes...but they sure are a blessing! Thank you for entrusting me with their care!)


even when ...

oh, and P.S., Lord...thank you that one of these guys who's apparently been living in our basement drop ceiling that we thought was out of the house & dead in the street MONTHS ago, didn't get very far in the basement before the Snake Guy came over & got him (and for putting me in "mom mode" this time instead of "freak out scared hysterical woman mode" like the first time I saw it!)

Take stock of your life. Trust me...it'll make you smile & make your troubles seem to become less!

Blessings everyone ~ Merana