Old Writing #2

I share with you now another old writing. I haven't been on here much at all for over a week & have some time (well, not really....but I'm sneaking it anyway!) now to check in on my BB's (bloggin' buddies!). I read one of my favorite places to rest a bit & commented the following, which God told me to share with all of you.

When we ask "what did I do to deserve this?", the Holy Spirit just shared with me, "because I trust you with it". WOW - God trusts me with whatever heartache, challenge, struggle, brokenness I'm facing? YES...so His light can shine all the brighter, and His strength can be made known in my weakness! Take heart, dear ones!!! And remember...you are...ALWAYS ENOUGH

I am always enough in God's eyes:

... even when I feel I can't seem to do anything right
... even when I feel that nobody cares
...even when I look different than others due to scarring, deformity, or handicap
...even when I look at myself with disappointment in the mirror be my size too tall, too short, too thin, or too large
...even when I frequently forget things
...even when I see my gray hairs, or no hair at all
...even when I can't get around as good as I used to
...even when it's harder to hear and to see
...even when I have a dispute with someone I care for
...even when I have problems that seem insurmountable
...even when...well, just "even when"...

I am always enough in His eyes because:

~ I am the shoulder for others to cry on
~ I am the comforting arms to rock a sick or scared child back to sleep, or to kiss away a boo-boo
~ I am here to send an encouarging note when someone feels down in despair
~ I am able to offer a light-hearted laugh when someone simply wants to forget the problems of the world
~ I am what helps make up the loving foundation for a home
~ I am the friend to offer a comforting word or hug when someone so desperate needs it
~ I am the proud parent cheering in the stands
~ I am the one who doesn't even have to say or do anyting at all, but just to "be there"
~ I am the child who carries the legacy of my parent's love that has been given me
~ I am the hand to hold and the ear to listen, not just "hear"

~ And, I am a small extension personifying the Great I AM, simply to serve others for Him...in reverential gratitude for His sacrifice for me.

Old Writing #1

Your Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light for my path (Psalm 119:105)

You will light my way along unfamiliar paths (Isaiah 42:16)


(photo credit: whitewolfjourneys.com)

I wrote this quite awhile back. God has been putting on my heart to share my writings with the world, and even helped me recently find these, as I had forgotten I even wrote them. He's told me point blank to post these...because someone out there desperately needs what these have to say. And now I know that to be even more true, because Satan has tried all kinds of tricks to keep this from posting (as I'm sitting here putting it all together for the 3rd time in the past hour....but this time with a prayer of protection around it lifted up first!). Be blessed by it, dear friends! ~ Merana


In the darkness Lord, You are the light.

~ Just as the gentle flicker of a candle flame, you penetrate the blackness.

~ In brilliance, you pierce through the obscurity.

~ When I lose my way Lord, You are the lighted windows welcoming me home.

~ You are the firelight where I curl up for warmth & comfort.

~ As I navigate through the channels of life, you are the lighthouse beacon to steer me on my course to reach safe harbor.

~ As I read your Word, your lamplight enlightens me.

~ You are my protective night light to chase away the scary monsters in life.

~ You, Lord God, are the searchlights in the night that reach heavenward to broadcast your love.

~ You are an usher with a flashlight seating me where it is best for me in life’s theater.

~ In emergencies, you are the track lighting on the floor to lead me to the nearest exit where you wait with loving arms.

~ You are the harbor lights, dear Father, leading me ever closer to shore.

~ You show me the brake lights in order that I may stop before harm comes my way.

~ Your neon lights flash “Love Here for the Taking”

~ Abba, You are my stage lights to showcase my talents with which you have blessed me.

~ Your street lights show me the way as I continue on life’s journey.

~ Your headlights are on high beam, to illuminate dark roads traveled, and to share with others the glory of your love.

~ Your light is much more beautiful than the most glorious sunset, Lord – and there is no dimmer.

~ And then you are the bright, quiet beauty of the full moon to fill the night sky.


Thank you Lord, God, for being my lamp and my light. I have found that there is beauty...and peace...and rest in the light!

You are missed

I have been busier than busy....nothing special....just the life of a single mom. Usually (a'hum/cough/cough/sputter/sputter) I would check in at work.....but haven't been able to do that. I have SO many blog ideas of things I want....no NEED...to post. I miss you all TERRIBLY. I haven't even read Spiritual Sundays....OH THE WITHDRAWAL!!!!!! I hope to be back in gear this w/e when the boys go to their dad's. In the meantime, please pray for me. It may sound trite, but my oldest & I are NOT getting along (& my problem is that he reminds me so much of my ex.....perhaps even more so feeding the problem???). I miss you terribly! Hugs ~ Merana

Once again...it's all about the timing (Hidden Treasure #2)

Latest buried gem discovered out of nowhere:

Psalm 106:13-15 (NIV)
13 But they soon forgot what he had done and did not wait for his counsel. 14 In the desert they gave in to their craving; in the wasteland they put God to the test. 15 So he gave them what they asked for, but sent a wasting disease upon them.

I've quoted C.S. Lewis before, but it just SO fits this Scripture..."There are those who say, 'God's will be done, and there are others to whom God says, 'Alright then, have it your way.'"

Waiting is probably the hardest thing we do as Christians. As members of the human race, I suppose we should all be considered toddlers: "I want what I want, and I want it NOW!" But like my friend, Sharon, commented in my previous post, we must remember that "waiting has something to teach me, too"!!

Psalm 19:21 (NIV) ~ Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails.

As Marcia Hollis says in God Meets Us Where We Are, "We make our plans, tell God what we intend to do, and then travel for quite a while before we realize that he simply isn't with us! It isn't that he leaves us on purpose...or shows us who's really boss. It's just that in the rush and hurry to get something done, ... we leave him far behind, lost in the crowd."

Often this is how I think God must look at me:

"Again!?!" and, I've heard Him clear as day say to me: "Would you please stop getting in the way and interfering with the plans I have for you!?!!!"

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV) ~ For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
I never really looked at it that way before, but I guess He certainly can't bring about those plans if we're always trying to do things our way, instead of waiting for His way... ;o} !!! (Ok, I know He doesn't look at me this way, really....probably more of a throw the hands up in the air, shake His head & say "there she goes again!")

Hollis continues, "If we try to go ahead of God's enabling Power, we will have to retrace our steps." We must remember ... Deuteronomy 31:8 (NIV) ~ The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."

It escapes our consciousness, I believe, that He has to work everything out along the line in order for everything to fall into place just right. He starts here ...

but there is much that needs to be done in order to get here....where He places the final piece of the intricate puzzle of our lives....us! It's rather like the interconnectedness we find here...

I rather like to pray as Henri J.M. Nouwen does, "Dear God, I am full of wishes, full of desires, full of expectations. Some of them may be realized, many may not, but in the midst of all my satisfactions and disappointments, I hope in you. I know that you will never leave me alone and will fulfill your divine promises. Even when it seems that things are not going my way, I know that they are going your way and that, in the end, your way is the best way for me. O Lord, strengthen my hope, especially when my many wishes are not fulfilled. Let me never forget that your name is Love. Amen."

Strengthen my hope indeed .... Romans 8:24b-25 (NIV) ~ But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

And remember .... Hebrews 6:18-19 (NIV) ~ ... it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope offered to us may be greatly encouraged. We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.

And just as Elisa Morgan said in I'm Tired of Waiting!,

"God is worthy to be trusted and believed, even when he appears inactive."

Please join us for Spiritual Sundays! You will find such an abundance of His grace here!

Timing is Everything (Hidden Treasure #1)

I simply love reading Scripture, especially in my devotional Bible. I love how quoted sections of author's books are interspersed throughout my Bible with related verses of the Word. It always brings something to my attention that I never "saw" before, even though I've read that particular passage several times. But more importantly, I love how the Holy Spirit brings to mind another part of Scripture that ties in perfectly...as well as other authors whose books I've read, from my collection of book quotes (although my collection is but dust on the bookcase of friends like Clif or Jan ... admittedly, because I mostly go to the library!)

Now...this little gem of hidden treasure came out of nowhere, as is often the case ;o} ! You know those are the ones the Lord really wants you to find...you know, yet another one of those "God things" that happens when you turn to part of the Bible you weren't intending to read, but you were drawn to it! (I love those times the best!)

Habakkuk 2:3 ~ The the Lord replied...For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.

which reminded me of ...

Ecclesiastes 3:11 ~ He has made everthying beautiful in its time.

which took me to...

Psalm 5:3 ~ ...in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation (see that?...expecting your answer to come...not hoping, but expecting!)

and then progressed into ...

Psalm 37:7 ~ Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him... (v. 28) For the Lord loves the just and will not forsake his faithful ones.


Judith Couchman writes in Lord, Have You Forgotten Me? Thirty Devotions to Encouarge You When Life Lets You Down, "There's a mystique about timing. When it's right, it's fabulous. When it's wrong, it's a disaster. It takes listening to the inner self to make it work. We know he's capable of doing anything, but we get impatient waiting for God. We forget that he waits for the right timing too. In fact, he knows perfect timing, even though it looks illogical to us. His ways are not our ways, and neither are his timetables our timetables. But when we wait for his timing, nothing can compare with its abiding impact on us."

And Ruth Graham says in In Every Pew Sits a Broken Heart, "...do not expect instant results. Simply expect God's results, for his results are always good."

Then I was reminded of a post by someone I follow that said, "Trusting God means we don't have to have all the answers." And what hit me right upside the head (ya know...Gibbs to Tony, NCIS thing) is...it's just that simple, just that black & white, no gray area...we either trust Him, or we don't! If we're going to believe one thing in Scripture, then we have to believe it all, or none of it is worth believing.

I believe Karen Kingsbury said (I forgot to write down the author & book when I wrote down this quote, but I believe I'm remembering correctly), "God doesn't forget any of us. We can't possibly know the good the Lord has in store for us, for His love and grace know no end if we will just trust - trust until it hurts and the Lord has an opportunity to work in our lives."

In His loving grace ~ Merana

Football!!!!

Are you ready for some FOOTBALL!?!!!!! Ok, so I know technically football season started last week, but I didn't have the boys last weekend, so it's just not the same. Today will be all about cheese sticks with marinara, hot wings with bleu cheese, and yummo chili!

This is our "craft tree". We decorate it for the different seasons/holidays. Jan-white & silver snowflakes, Feb-add hearts to Jan., Mar-white & green with shamrocks, Apr-Easter goodies & spring flowers, May-keep the spring flowers 'til week of Memorial Day, then all red/white/blue, June - purples & greens & summery colored decorations made from scrapbook paper, July & August back to the red/white/blue, Oct-Halloween decoration the boys made when they were younger, Nov-fall flowers & leaves & ribbon, Dec-obviously Christmas.

But Sept. is saved for THIS GUY...our FOOTBALL TREE!
The twirlies are just chenille sticks (pipe cleaners) wrapped around a pencil, then went to the Steelers & Ravens websites & copied jerseys & other things they sell & printed it on cardstock to cut out, and the footballs are just cut out of scrapbook paper. My older son & I love the Steelers & my younger son loves the Ravens (gets interesting in our house when they play each other...actually, my younger son will usually go to his dad's so they can cheer for the Ravens together). Anyway, we LOVE making this craft tree. Loads of fun...football season is just the best!

Praying for everyone's safety...players, refs, fans, tailgaters, those watching games at different establishments, all! Let the games begin!

GO STEELERS! (and Ravens!) ;o}

My house

Ok, I confess to being brought to beyond the absolute breaking point in my faith. Not at the end of my rope, but hanging on to the very last thread of that shredded, unraveled rope. It was the worst experience in my life...worse that the death of my mother and of my marriage falling apart at the same time. Ever been to this place?

Several years ago I was praying constantly about a situation in my life. I was so undecided what to do when the Holy Spirit told me to proceed on a certain path. Knowing Satan as I do, I spoke the name of Jesus and commanded Satan to flee as I asked the Lord again if this was the road God wanted me to travel. Now, previously the Holy Spirit told me point blank when I was torn with a decision I was asking for guidance about, was "if you don't have a peace about it, it's not from me". Ok, so in this situation I had that peace...excitement even!

So I traveled down that path. And everything didn't fall apart, or simply not go the way I hoped & planned for....no, it blew up in my face, big time. I was so hurt, so disillusioned, so devastated, so disgusted....and then so mad. I was furious at God and I let Him know it in no uncertain terms. My spirit felt utterly destroyed...as if it was totally disconnected to my person...like part of me just died that day.

I remember being at my friend, Kathleen's, house just sobbing & I just slid down the cabinets into a heap on the floor. I was living a crushed, devastated, destroyed spirit. It was more than just not getting what I wanted to believe was going to happen, what was going to be the best. It was about feeling utterly betrayed and led astray by the one Person I should be able to trust with everything. And I'll tell ya...it's a true friend who will turn off dinner on the stove and join you in that heap on the floor, with tears streaming down her face too. (looking back now, I realize that was one of the greatest blessings in the mess of my life! Thank you, dear Kathleen....you will never understand what that gesture of your sweet, loving spirit did to carry me through!)

I admit that my faith was gone! I railed at God, "I did what You told me to do and this is what I get in return? This is what believing in You means? It's all a lie. No thanks! I want no part of it or You." So yes...Satan won...he got another one. I have never felt more devastated in my life. Not only did my human side hurt, but my spirit hurt. I understood wailing.

Well, after a few days of yelling at God, or snide comments to Him, it occurred to me, 'why are you still talking to Him if you say you don't believe in Him?' Hmmm??? Why indeed! Well, what I didn't remember...and Satan chose to ignore...is that the battle is the Lord's, just like 1 Samuel 17:47 tells us.

God spoke right into my broken, devastated heart and told me, "Yes, daughter, I allowed your house of faith to be destroyed just like a tornado will do...
...your house wasn't as strong as you thought it was.

But what's left after you clear the debris?
The foundation. And it is upon that foundation WE are going to build a bigger, and much stronger, house of faith together...one that can withstand the storms much better. He revealed that there is only so much you can try to bury away and keep the doors closed & locked in your spirit of not dealing with issues. You have to deal with everything in life eventually...even when your house is destroyed. So, through shaking uncertainty, I said, "Ok Lord, I'm still really upset with you, but I will help you build."

And, as always, He was right to do it. My house was nowhere near as strong as I thought it was. And it was revealed months later that had I been "successful" in traveling that path....well, let's just say it would have impacted my life in one of the most negative manners I've ever experienced. So, in allowing this devastation, He was really saving me and my children ....as He always does.... and He was building me stronger.

And I admit that several years after that, I had another really bad scrape in my faith. But the house still stood! I had warning signs that I chose to ignore, so I have no one to blame but myself. But it's what finally led to surrender. I still was holding on to "control" of my life (that's just such a misnomer!). But this last time, I finally gave up completely...total & complete surrender to His plans for my life. And He has blessed me tremendously!

This blog was born from that. What a blessing this has become in my life with all the lovely friends I have made here. I only pray that some of what I say reaches into your spirits and encourages you with what He knows you need. That is why I'm here. Not for me. But to reach you for Him....sort of as a channel you turn to on the tv that captivates you and speaks right into your soul with what you desperately need to hear. I leave that up to Him. I know He will direct everyone here who needs to read exactly what He wants them to know...to assure them that even through this means....He is with you always!

I know there will be future trials, but for now....I'm praising & reveling in where He's brought me...and fortifying my house with devoted time in Him.

Blessings & love in Him ~ Merana

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